Let’s talk about sex…

By Luisa Bustos, 11 February 2019 , Comments

“I didn't know Northcott offered services to help me explore sex and see if I could actually do it. Then I spoke to Alicia [Northcott’s Sexuality and Relationships Coordinator]. She helped me with the first steps and how to go about seeing a sex worker. She made me feel more comfortable and actually want to give it a go.”

Just like any young adult, Mohammed was curious about relationships and sex. However, living with cerebral palsy, he wasn’t sure what he would be capable of and how to go about exploring his sexuality. Northcott’s Sexuality and Relationships Education service was just the support network Mohammed needed to access practical advice and build his confidence.

“I thought about it for a few years before I contacted Alicia. Eventually I talked myself into it. I’d never experienced sex before so I wanted to know how it felt,” he explains.

With little knowledge of relationships, dating or how to go about connecting with a sex worker, Mohammed was grateful he could meet privately with Alicia and talk about what he wanted to do.

In individual sessions, Alicia gave Mohammed practical advice including websites he could look at to find escorts, as well tips on contacting people, ideas for dates and what to expect when meeting a sex worker for the first time.

“It has helped me know what services are out there and what I’m capable of. If I didn’t have the support from Northcott, I wouldn’t have known it’s okay and normal to want to explore my sexuality,” Mohammed explains.

“If I need advice on something Alicia will look it up for me. She also helps me write letters or emails or gives me suggestions on what to say. Then we meet up again to see the progress and see where I’m at.

“I’ve also been really happy with the support workers who have helped me. I’ve learnt it is important to feel comfortable with the support worker you choose to help you.”

Mohammed has also participated in Northcott’s group workshops on relationships and sexuality, and attended our Feel the Vibe Forum and Expo – both of which he found useful and interesting.

Having knowledge and realistic expectations about what can happen has helped Mohammed build his confidence.

“Now I know I can explore my sexuality and just be myself. I think the best thing for me is that it has given me more confidence in myself, and made me a happier person. I just feel better about myself. That’s something I'm not sure that I would have been able to do without Alicia's help.”

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This story was published in Northcott’s 2017–18 Annual Report.

Curious about our award-winning Feel the Vibe Expo and Forum – find out more here.

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