Asking somebody you like or who you want to spend more time with on a date can be daunting and stressful. But it’s doesn’t have to be! It’s important to remember that going on a date is just a way to get to know someone better and have some fun!

Northcott’s relationships and sexuality expert Alicia Melita has some advice to help relieve your nerves when setting up a first date and more importantly, make sure your date is fun and enjoyable.

Arranging your date

When you are setting up your first date, try to think about these steps to make sure you feel comfortable and safe on the date.

• Arrange to meet in a public place

You don’t really know the person yet so it’s important to meet in a public place. Try meeting at a coffee shop or restaurant. Avoid going to places like the movies as you won’t get a chance to chat and get to know the other person better.

• Arrange to make your own way there

It’s important to arrange your own transportation to the date. Avoid getting a lift with your date. Again, remember you don’t really know the person yet.

• Don’t double (or triple) text!

Communication before the date is really important – but don’t over do it! Wait until you get a reply first before sending another text. If the person doesn’t respond the first time, try again in a few days. If they don’t reply the second time, wait a few more days and try again. If they don’t reply after the third attempt, it usually means they aren’t interested.

Date night – How to make it a success

So you’ve set the date, now what? These tips will ensure your first date is as successful as possible:

• Dress for success

Shower, brush your teeth, put on deodorant and wear clean clothes. These simple tasks show that you care about your appearance and how you are represented. You may even impress your date!

• Take turns asking questions

It’s important to ask the other person questions and, more importantly, listen to their answers. Make sure you also talk about yourself – it’s not an interview. The other person will want to know about you and your interests as well.

• Don’t share too much information

Avoid talking about anything too deeply personal like an ex-partner. Keep the conversation light and fun on a first date! Be careful about what information you share on the first date. Avoid sharing personal details like your address – remember you don’t really know the person yet. Whether or not you want to mention your disability on the first date is up to you. If your date asks you questions about your disability, it’s best to be open and honest from the beginning.

• Switch off (or on silent)

It’s important to have a phone with you but don’t be on it all night. Switch your phone on silent - your friends can wait until after the date to find out all about it!

• Don’t drink too much

If you do decide to drink on the first date, limit it to one drink.

• Most importantly, HAVE FUN!

If it doesn’t work out, don’t worry! Remember that’s what dating is all about, working out if you enjoy being in the company of the other person. Sometimes it won’t work out and that’s okay! When it comes to dating, it’s important you have some fun along the way!

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